I failed so many times in my life. I might say i'm a failure story. I got the need to fail and deal with those feelings of being in a tough situation.In fact, my main suspicion related to failing, and blaming ourselves lies on our parents.They always said be the best in class, get the highest scores so you can become the president of the united states.My parents told me "don't fail, avoid failing, its bad. Go on the path for guaranteed success."
Do you believe there is a path for guaranteed success?In all honesty, path of guaranteed success is the path of illusion. It will lead you everywhere but the place you want to go.
You're always going to miss your chance, if you never take a risk.My belief is you should take a risk. You might land on rock bottom. Once you will survive that, I can promise you there are very few things in life that can scare you.A a result of failing, i hear many people i work with tell me they want to give up. I don't want you to give up. I want you to rise from this fail like a Phoenix, and grow from there.
Those are few things i use in term of how & why:
- Go back to 'why'. When you fail and you want to give up its because you need to refresh your why's. When setting a goal you want to achieve in life. The first thing you ask yourself is why. Why is a fundamental question, and even if you already asked yourself before, then you should ask yourself again. Because the answer for your why's is changing constantly. The why of yesterday might not be the why of today. Simon Sinek is talking about it on he's book start with why.
- Set a different 'how'. Albert Einstein said, "Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." I know a lot of people that failed, and they were stubborn to keep going without changing the how. As a result of that they failed again and again. In some point you will be hurt and exhausted from failing from the same reason, over and over again. The secret is to change the how. Use a different strategy. Try a different methods. Keep moving.
How to change the mindset:
- Aim for small success. Failing is sometimes hard because we have high expectations. I love to fail, and i think its important. But i love success, and the feeling of fulfillments much more. When I fail and i reevaluate what is going to be my next aim, i focus on small success. Small success is rewarding. Because of the sensation of winning in your body, consequently your physical body will experience the feel of winning. Once your body will experience those feelings it will not lose hope.
- Take a break & use movement. Sometimes everything that we need to do is stop all the activity, clean your mind, and move your body. First of all we are not machines, hence we need to take a break to clear the mind. I strongly recommend to use the nature, beach, some kind of disconnection that is available to you can be great. Second do any kind of movement exercise. Go and do yoga, run, pilates, martial arts, gym. What ever you can do to move your physicalness, stimulate your body- open your mind.