Focusing on the past its one of the issues that worries me. Its a very common problem I hear from people I worked with. I guess it comes from the modern psychology approach of solving the past.I see benefits from modern psychology, there are some nice tools. But the general approach of focusing on the past, and try to fix all the conflicts will lead you to frustration.
Whats turning me off regarding the past focused mindset:
- Time. You can spend a whole life trying to solve your past problems, its ridicules. How is it going to benefit spending so much time to fix issues, solve traumas? Don't you have bettr things to use your time?
- Its dead. Yes, you heard me right, the past is dead. Burried underground. There are no time machines, as I know. So I strongly recommand to focus on the living, on what is there. To scale your present
- Growth. When you focus on the past, you're going to prevent the growth. Yes, by going back you will be able to deal with some things, but putting it on your main focus is going to do the opposite of growing. Its going to use your powerful forces of thoughts, and creations. Simply you're going back to what is gone.
So here's how you can stay present
- Meditation. By practicing meditation you learn how to increase relaxation, slowing down, help you feeling a sense of peace, and learning to live in the present moment. I recommend doing a vipassana retreat. I have participated 3 times in vipassana course. Probably the best thing happened to me.
- Observe. This is one of the most powerful methods I use to stay in the moment, and become present. What you should do is focus when you witness something, and to be seen. So basically what you should do is when you witness a tree, you see yourself. So you're looking at the object while you see yourself. It takes practice but the outcome is wonderful.
- Straight back. Once my meditation teacher told me a very important tip. My back was always hurting me when meditation for an hour, so I came to him and ask what should I do? he told me: "when your back is straight, your mind is straight". So my attention always when i'm writing, walking, or sitting somewhere is to keep my back straight. Its important to focus on the lower back to be straight, and don't be stiffen you lower back.